Comments on: Marriage And Money: Approaching Your Spouse About Their Spending Habits

By: Elizabeth I

Elizabeth I — Sun, 24 Jan 2010 20:39:57 +0000

It can be very difficult to have such a conversation with a spouse and all too frequently there are more problems than this one at play. If your spouse is an addict or has a severe behavioral disorder, if the situation is dire or heading in that direction here are some practical solutions.

1) Reduce the credit limit on the credit cards. I know of a woman who decided to treat herself to a Cartier watch ($3000+). The next time she used her card over a certain limit. It was declined. Her husband greatly reduced the limit.

2) Separate checking accounts. I know of another couple whose husband kept bouncing checks. They were in marriage counseling and the counselor told the wife that it is time to have separate checking accounts. She cannot save his credit, but she can save her own.

3) Let natural consequences occur. Here is another story. One wife let her husband take control of the finances and bill paying. Subsequently she had to call him at work and let him know that the electricity had been shut off. It was a big eye opener for him when he had to deal with the mess that his late payments caused.

4) Counseling, counseling, and more counseling. Dave Ramsey once told a caller who said “what if my wife refuses to agree to a budget, should I just cut her off all the accounts?” He said that he needed marriage counseling.

By: Tracie

Tracie — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 00:50:11 +0000

We often discuss the things…but I avoid putting myself in a precarious position. I remain cautious about giving other people control over my resources..its just like becoming guarantor.Personally I feel we can always communicate about the problems and we much reach to a conclusion that careful planning will help us avoid the pitfall of money crisis.http://www.habitchanger.com/money

By: Mr. Debtbeater

Mr. Debtbeater — Mon, 03 Mar 2008 14:07:02 +0000

I certainly find that I have to have conversations with my wife all the time. It’s an ongoing effort that we both have to make and compromise on. Don’t expect it to be a one-time thing that you can fix like a broken chair. :)

One key for us is definitely to have that little bit of blow money. I even give her twice as much as I get and we’re comfortable with that. That was my compromise. “OK, we can have spending money, but it can only be $40/mo for the whole family or we’ll have to start sacrificing elsewhere. I tell ya what, you can have 20, and me and the kids will do 10 each.” Instant brownie points for sacrificing my “needs” for hers!